BYM May 2006: A Good Marriage Has Two Learners!

A good marriage has two
learners! Would you like to live
on the growing edge of your
marriage? An alive marriage is
one in which both partners are
learning and growing together.
Are you a learner in your
marriage?

Here’s a checklist to see if
you're learning or losing:

A learner says, “Let’s find
out.” A loser says, “Nobody
knows.”
A learner who makes a
mistake says, “I was wrong.”
A loser says, “It wasn’t my
fault!”
A learner goes through a
problem. A loser goes
around it.
A learner listens. A loser just
waits for his turn to talk.
A learner explains. A loser
explains away.
A learner knows what to fight
for and what to compromise
on. A loser compromises on
what he shouldn’t and fights
for what’s not worth fighting
about.
A learner paces himself. A
loser has two speeds—
panicky and passive!

Remember, in marriage failures
can be opportunities to learn. Be
a learner in your marriage, and
you’ll be a winner.

For more One-Minute Marriage
Builder tips and resources, visit
www.marriagealive.com.

Yes, the title of the article refers
to 'two' learners. Well men, let's
take the lead on this. Let's be
the example of a learner to our
wives. Let's impress our wives
with our desire to be a
learner--let's WOW that woman!

Your assignment, if you so
choose: take a moment to think
about what areas in your
marriage (or your wife) that you
would like to more learn about;
write these down; then, prioritize
the top three. Now, how's about
applying some SMART goals
(from BYM March Issue) to learn
about your #1?

Well brothers, SCHOOL IS IN
SESSION--let's see our wives as
our high school sweethearts; hit
that library to study together;
learn new subjects; walk her
home from school; hold her
hand; take her out for a soda;
complete all our assignments;
pass those tests; enjoy Home
Economics; and bring home that
good report card. Some fun,
some romance, and, of course,
lots of hard work!

I'd like to close with some words
from Abigail Adams (wife of 2nd
US President, John Adams),
"Learning is not attained by
chance, it must be sought for
with ardor and attended to
with diligence." Brothers, are
you up for the challenge?

Bless your marriage,
Brother Willie Quan

Having lived in apartments all my
life, I never had the chance to
really develop any home
improvement or repair skills.
Last month, I spent a week with
my father-in-law, Wayne,
working on our new house.
During that week, we installed a
sprinkler system, electric ground
fault outlets, ceiling fans, built a
foundation for a storage shed,
and lots more. I learned so
much! Now, I have these
valuable new skills for the rest of
my life. Each thing that I learned
took listening to instructions,
observing how things were
done, practicing what was
taught, having patience with the
process. In short, it took hard
work! All these things that I
learned will definitely save me
lots money in the future--now,
this is literally a 'treasure'.

Sharing this recent experience
with you is my way of
introduction to the significance
of this month's BYM
topic--LEARNING. So brothers,
let's put on our learning caps
and open our minds for growth.

The center column "A Good
Marriage Has Two Learners!" is
from: 60 One-Minute Marriage
Builders by Dave & Claudia Arp.